AN INSIGHT!!!!

Yesterday I was really into hanging around and reading the discussions at that one online forum I paritcipate.

I got all caught up with my assignments for the creative course of said forum and started working on next week’s assignment.

The assignment had a worksheet to fill out.
SO hard.

I struggled to answer all the questions and at some point I had an insight – yeeesss! – on why I was getting so stuck on things!

I wrote all down on the worksheet, run out of room and jumped into my journal.

I pour it all out and to summarize there was my huge-ground-breaking insight:

Notice that it was such a powerful insight that I cross out the “need” which sounded much like an “at some point” and decided to make it a NOW action.

I really felt stoked by my finding.

THAT is why I am stuck lately!  I keep questioning my gut feelings.

I feel something is right but doubt it and end up doing nothing!

ooooohhhh excitement!! 😀 Really…. that IS light at the end of the tunnel! Making choices!

NOW I AM ROCKING ALL AROUND! hehehehe

Sure thing the awareness is only the first step. Watching my mind-tricks to pull me into old patterns will be the challenge.

The day after my ground-breaking insight I was talking to a friend and during the conversation I realized how hard it is for me to settle within the “I don’t know or I am figuring out” area, you know?

I always had someone to tell me what to do if I didn’t know  {“that’s how we had always done that”} or what direction to go – {“this is the best route for sure! Why wouldn’t someone want that?”} or I would at least believe I already had the answer and I would just go for it.

Sitting with the “I don’t know, I am experimenting, I am figuring it out”, is very new.

I hadn’t practise my “trust-my-self” muscles in years and all of a sudden I realize I need to exercise them and I did so. They feel sore. Very sore.

But I see now that it is a good sore you know? Like after working out at the gym.

Very happy with my insight. 😀

That insight paired with my quest on ignoring my perfectionism and I will find my ways to unstuck and move forward! <3

*** happy all around ***

Love, love, love